Alright here's the fucking deal:

I'm pretty fucking bored on Newgrounds (did so much guide work, and yet have to handle the horribly-moderated abuse post one day), so I want to do something interesting.

As I have said countless times, I hate the BBS moderators to an endless degree, so I thought that I should make a ban message that makes them look like an ass, or make a really stupid unprofessional ban message.

Example:

Reason for ban: My dick hurts - Poozy

All I need you all to do, is provide the following details:

- The moderator who did the banning
- The reason for ban
- The moderator's ban signature (if applicable)
- Length of ban
- Remaining time left on ban (Days, Hours, Minutes, Seconds)
- The user that got the ban (optional)

NOTE: The length can last from 1-30 days.

...and I will provide the full image by uploading it to Dumping Grounds. It will look completely like as if the mod actually banned you. Some people do use Photoshop, but there is always a detectable element that shows that it's not real (ie. a slightly brighter font). This post will be closed when it passes its expiration date, and images made will be deleted 30 days after.

So go nuts! Provide the required information below, and I will give you the complete ban message and it looks 100% real. You can request as many ban messages as you want.

Eventually I may post an example, but not now as I have tons of homework to do...

Expiration date: April 31st, 2010

People's birthday should be the day their father's sperm and mother's ovum (egg) have merged together. Rather than the day when you were expelled from your mother's womb/vagina/whatever.

Let's think about it; the time when the two gametes (sex cells) is the time when life (a human) has been created, so wouldn't it make sense to make that moment the birthday of somebody?

I see this as a two-sided argument, but personally I think the time in the mother's womb when a human was one single cell before it divided billions of times should be the "birth day" since it was the time life was created. Then again some people believe that when the two cells come together it's not a human until it's a fetus...

Discuss, and state what factor YOU think should be one's birthday: the day when you came out of your mother's womb or the day when your first cell was created and all your DNA came together.

There are times where I just WANT to kill 10 people in the school.

BECAUSE THOSE 10 PEOPLE GROUP UP AND CLOG THE HALLWAY WITH THEIR BULLSHIT DISCUSSION.

Like REALLY? There is something called "standing outside of the hallway" that some dumbfucks can't understand. Like half the time like 20 girls huddle up in the middle of the hallway, thus blocking everyone else from getting to where they should go. ALL BECAUSE THEY WANT TO TALK ABOUT THEIR SHIT.

It's like cholesterol building up in your vessels; a PAIN in the FUCKING ASSHOLE.

Not only that, but occasionally I see a boyfriend and girlfriend just walking like a snail; taking 1 step per TWO seconds and expressing their love (occasionally exchanging a kiss). Now I don't have a problem with that, AS LONG AS THEY DON'T WALK SLOW AS SHIT. That's right, they just walk real slow so that getting across 1 meter (3.3 feet) will take 30 seconds when it would normally take like 6 for normal walking speed. And to make it worse, they will stop and just hug each other. WTF?????? Now if they walk at normal speed and do their crap; I wouldn't have a problem. But like 19 out of 20 times they walk real slow, and are as bad, if not worse, than the boys/girls (mainly girls) that huddle in the middle of the hallway. It's like having a slow ass driver driving 30 miles below the speed limit in a single lane road; you can't overtake him, and you can lose your tolerance.

Next time I see people doing shit like this I'm going to pierce straight through and break apart their group/couple. And this will not be the first time I will do this, nor will it be the last. Time to discipline these punks into getting their sorry asses into their classes instead of their socializing bullshit.

I can do extreme crap IRL as well as in Newgrounds too.

Discuss this bullshit.

http://www.newgrounds.com/dump/item/ab 9a620f600aeda05a03860245d72fa5

You got to be shitting me.

SHIT SHIT SHIT SHIT SHIT SHIT SHIT SHIT SHIT SHIT SHIT SHIT SHIT SHIT SHIT SHIT SHIT SHIT SHIT SHIT SHIT SHIT SHIT SHIT SHIT SHIT SHIT SHIT SHIT SHIT SHIT SHIT SHIT SHIT SHIT SHIT SHIT SHIT SHIT SHIT SHIT SHIT SHIT SHIT SHIT SHIT SHIT SHIT SHIT SHIT SHIT SHIT SHIT SHIT SHIT

SOMEBODY SHOOT ME FOR MY MISERABLE FAIL. FUCK FUCK FUCK!

This can't be! I must be dreaming! No... IT IS REALITY!!!!!

I posted a THNG, except I posted it TO THE BBS BY FUCKING ACCIDENT!!!!!!!! OH TEH NOES!

I failed. FFFFFFFFFFFFFUUUUUUUUCCCCCCCCKKKKKKKKK KK!

Seriously if I had hit the "Post it! >" button I think I will kill myself.

http://www.newgrounds.com/dump/item/20 53a47d9d038a6bd956caf1f0617de2

If any of you don't get the fail (like one person didn't in the comments), or think that posting to the BBS is an epic fail to me (which actually is, but that's besides the point) maybe this will give you a clue.

Read the title above.

NGReviewEater (this) got called a gimmick account, and now TNGG, an NG Guide experimental account, got called a gimmick account.

So what the fuck is a gimmick account?

And no I'm not PMing a mod because either (A) I will get a smartass reply, (B) I will get a lie to fuck me up even more in the future (for their pleasure banning), or (C) I will have wasted my precious time getting no reply at all. Yes that's how low I think about them.

So all of you 2009, 2008 and the 2007 users that signed up beyond April 10th, 2007 should shut the fuck up.

TNGG: http://www.newgrounds.com/dump/item/6d 4c85494cde701bf9c6fb69ea4809f3

NGRE: http://www.newgrounds.com/dump/item/06 e3977208141f33205cc5b0d0c28f8d

SMBS: http://www.newgrounds.com/dump/item/2a f10a36580604cd4d5d5933bb972ccc

Epic moderation FAIL. *FACEPALM*

"Expect a ban on your main account when I find it." Well he/she found one of the two mains, but then failed to find the second one. And the funny thing is, the one he/she forgot to banned is the one I'm most sensitive about getting banned; I can care WAY less about NGReviewEater.

The funny thing is, once that 30 day ban expires (trust me those dumb fucks will forget to reset it to 30 days; Poozy tried to ban THIS account permanently but then failed to do so), I'm still not going to heed their warning. I'm going to fight to the very end.

To top the ice cream cone off:

http://www.newgrounds.com/dump/item/40 5ed3b96e2b857fed3c020e6db22553

It said HERE "supermariobross" yet that dumb fuck who banned both NGRE and TNGG didn't ban SMBS. WWWWWWOOOOOOWWWWWWW....... just WOW.

*Becomes dumbfounded due to too much retardation and fail*

This idea has been stuck in my head, and I want to ask everyone if it's a good idea...

Should I create a very compressed version of the Newgrounds Guide, and call it "The TL;DR Newgrounds Guide"?

This idea has been bugging me because the Newgrounds Guide in SMBS is still at the freaking preliminaries after 2 months (but I'm almost out of the preliminary section and into the History of Newgrounds), so maybe I should make a much smaller version of the NG Guide, for it will take less time to prepare.

No I will not trash the 70,000 news post version in SMBS.

YES that also means both accounts will get the blank posts. YES it's ridiculous, and YES it means more "spam" on two accounts. However once the TL;DR version is done, SMBS will once again be the only account to get the blank posts.

The TL;DR version is anticipated to be only 1,000 news posts long.

YES it's 1/70th of the long version's length. However it will cut out a lot of material that makes the long guide more fun and interesting, such as:

- Interactive Guides
- History of Newgrounds
- Front page
- Games
- Movies
- Collections
- Series
- Compression of a lot of section in the long guide
- No more blank posts for additional portals beyond the Writing Portal
- No guide on how to vote fairly
- No Alpha section
- No error fixing of the FAQ
- BBS section is just the BBS rulebook. Speaking of the BBS...
- No Wi/Ht? FAQ
- No Archive
- No Screenshot Archive (big one)
- No flash/audio/art resources (useful one gone here)
- Chat will be 1-5 news posts long (1 post more likely)
- No downloads section
- Mature section is 5 news posts long
- No Network (Affiliation) section
- No Rankings section
- No secrets explained (yes this one will be on the long one, despite it not being allowed)
- No RSS
- No guide lounge. Go to the preliminaries in the long version
- Site moderation section will be 3 posts long
- No NG Store

The goal is to produce a Newgrounds Guide open for use by users while the more-indepth one can still continue on its slow path. And in the long run, this version will definitely help the long version in case I forget to add some details. It's very crappy FYI (crappy meaning the quality is comparable to the Wi/Ht? users giving crappy answers to threads), and the longer version will definitely kick the smaller version's sorry ass without any questions.

So thoughts? Comments? Should I do it or not? It's not too hard; maybe a little more strain but that's it. However the reward is more pleasing than the pain endured. It's a little bit of a "down payment" type of plan, because I can simply extract the information out of the short version and put it into the long version. And the reward of having a usable guide is worth the burden of making 1,000 additional news posts. So in the end it's a 0 loss project, or maybe a -5 loss project.

I strongly like this idea, but I would like all of your opinions. The ultimate decision rests with me (and somewhat with Wade Fulp), but you all can influence my decision.

BTW, this will be hosted in NGReviewEater, NOT SuperMarioBrosS. So I can get in 8 blank posts per 2 hours.